To call or not to call...eh, let him wait.

Got the "hey friend, just thought you should know I've met someone, and its going well" phone call from my ex-bf, Romeo...Ok, so that's not a call most people get because their exes have common sense and more manners. But I got the call nonetheless. I sat through the call saying "well, good for you" when I felt like saying "are you shitting me with this?" and said goodbye. I mean really said goodbye. To the possibility of us finding each other again. To hoping he'll have an epiphany and he'll decide he can't live without me. To the good memories we had, since now all I think of are the jerky things he's done and berate myself for letting it go on so long. To a future of not having to get out and date again.

But no, the story doesn't quite end there. Two days later I got the "I know that was hard to hear, but it's because I haven't been honest in the last months since our break up, but you should now know I began to move on past us right away, and I feel guilty about not telling you that then" email. Oh yeah, believe it. I know-a slap in the face, no? More like a punch in the gut. I've tried the friendship angle with him over the past 5 months apart to hang on to something I was afraid to be without, as well as to come across as the cool ex-gf so he'd miss me and realize he's making a mistake. Now that lil gameplan has bit me in the ass.

Why is he doing this, you ask? Beats me! Maybe the new date he's had has given him a new lease on life and he wants to clear the cobwebs away? Maybe me texting him Hey there, thinking of you, caused him to feel sorry for me so he thought he better pull out the honesty-card and let me down easy...er like a ton of rocks more like it.

So my simple reply to that overly wordy and jackassy email was "You know what? Enough with the honesty. I've had all I can take." Hmph! There!

About 10 hrs later I get a phone call from him, which I did NOT answer, thankyouverymuch....ugh, then a text blinged..."I'm so sorry, it was stupid of me. It was not honesty, it was stupid and I shouldn't have sent it. I feel sick to my stomach. I'm so sorry."

WTF? How do I respond to that? Your whole condescending call and email were lies? I don't think so! You don't send emails unless you have something to say and you said it like 3 different ways in that email. YOU ARE OVER ME AND HAVE BEEN SINCE NOVEMBER. OWN IT! MAN UP AND STAND BY YOUR STATEMENTS!

I replied to the text, "I don't know what to say." That was last night. I haven't spoken to him yet, or emailed. My BFF Cora assured me that my silence sends the same message as reeming him out for his idiocy, but even better.

I've got to sever my ties to continue to move on. I can't ease his guilt. I can't be his friend. Not right now. Maybe not ever. My anger will fade in about a day and I will be back to consciously NOT calling/texting/emailing...as in starting to and stopping myself. Taking a deep breath and literally NOT doing something that will perpetuate the pain.



Hmmm..where will my NEW gameplan take me? :)